While some stress is a normal part of life, excessive stress can interfere with productivity and reduce physical and emotional health. Finding ways to manage stress is not about making huge changes to every aspect of your life or work. Rather, stress management requires focus on the one thing that’s always within your control: you.

This guest post from Yvonne Anderson at Safe Space Coaching provides practical tips to help you and your employees to reduce overall stress levels.

The gift of having little stress in your life is the enhanced value it can give to the relationships with the people around you.

Let me paint a picture…

Imagine you are really stressed (accumulated stress), so without getting too medical the symptoms may be manifesting themselves as irritability, constant alertness, tight shoulders and neck, digestive complaints, high blood pressure leading to headaches, being snappy, forgetful and on edge. Possibly feeling rather anxious and overwhelmed at the amount of stress you are under.
You are likely neglecting self-care and are under a huge amount of pressure to perform on the job, at home, as a partner, mother or father. You are likely spreading yourself so thin across so many areas of life that you are not really showing up fully to any of them.
You don’t have time for pleasantries and you certainly don’t have the capacity to take care of those around you. You scarcely have time for anything let alone yourself.

Think about that for a moment. Take a deep breath and be really honest with yourself. Are you carrying the weight of the world on your challenged shoulders?

Now let me paint a very different picture…

Imagine you have small, short, sharp bursts of stress in your life but generally relaxed. So you likely feel calm, content, in control, pleasant, alert, self aware, motivated and composed.
You take care of yourself first and foremost as you know that if you first take care of yourself you can therefore be more fully present to not only the people around you but to the work you do.
You have time to talk to others and you can show up in life with compassion, empathy, understanding and mindfulness.

Think about that for a moment. Take a deep breath and be honest with yourself. Are you a great person to be around because of these qualities?

The first step to being a less stressed person is to identify your current stressors. Stress is highly subjective so it is best to do this exercise alone. To give and get the most from our relationships it is a great exercise to:

Step 1. Get a big sheet of paper out and draw yourself or write your name in the middle.

Step 2. Write at the top:
The things I stress/worry/get anxious about the most are……….
I lie in bed at night or get woken up with thoughts like……….
I feel very afraid of……….

Step 3. Group the stressors into branches such as work, home, health, relationships etc.

Step 4. Identify if this stress/worry from past, present, future? Most of the things we tend to worry about are either in the past or way into the future, we catastrophize situations.

Step 5. Realise that nothing is trivial…if it is a worry for you then it is obviously important in your life.

Step 6. Make a plan to deal with each stressor one at a time. You might want to talk with someone you trust to support you through this process.

Give yourself and others the gift of being a less stressed person and watch how your relationships transform.

Being there for others with empathy, understanding, compassion, mindfulness and truly listening to others will change your relationships for the better and in turn change those people’s relationships too.

Gallup carried out wellbeing research, which showed that if you have a happy friend, your chances of being happy increase by 25%.

Who wouldn’t want that as part of their work day?

Yvonne Anderson is a professional and personal development coach who works in Wellington. Visit her website at www.safespacecoaching.com. You can read Yvonne's blog at www.quote-ching.blogspot.com